Broken Compass

I go over the memory again and again
Until it’s rubbed raw
Until it wells blood that dribbles down the edges of my defective mind
It’s all unraveling
In place of the light that was the essence of me
Lies masterful spiders
Webbing starless skies of bleak yellow
The room is sickening
And in it, the remaining real part of me
Dissolves to fear
What’s left is the non arachnophobic residue
What’s left is not me

I breathe in the dust
And blame my teary eyes
To the dry weather
That I conjured
In a desperate attempt
To replace the confused mist
Of once alert eyes
And I’m not sure which is worse
Lucidity is only a reflection of a numbed mind
In which reality
Should not have existed

In the depths
Of inhaling lines
I write what my drenched pillow
Translates to ink
And crawling dawnings
Of cruel epiphanies

I know too much
About the truth of me

My immune system is failing
To predict the reforming mutations
Of the past and how it was supposed to be
I withdraw to escape
The chase of my vivid imagination
Of a heroic version of me
And one that cannot be

To state it simply,
Here lies the nothingness
Of Empty
And in it
The reserve of life takes a pained breath
Leaving the duality of being alive and living

Behind
To the shell named I.

26 thoughts on “Broken Compass

  1. W O W!!
    Here I think that, the poet can’t move on from his past and be can’t sort of get hold of the future/present too. He’s stuck in these webs. But I believe that it is something much much more than this.
    He’s blaming himself for his mistakes a LOT. Can’t say I have been here but it definitely makes me feel AAAAHH for him/her. You know the feeling? AAAAAH? ๐Ÿค’
    Duality of being alive and living. The shell named I.
    What a beauty ending ๐Ÿฅบ๐Ÿฅบ๐Ÿฅบ๐Ÿ’–. How have you been random question

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    1. Oh dayum ๐Ÿ˜‚ Very very good interpretation. Not giving too much away because I AM the poet and this is me ๐Ÿ˜‚

      How have I been hmmmm
      Some days I need reminders to make myself breathe.
      Others are days consisting of two blinks in which there’s no telling what’s the time.
      And some are pure bliss.
      So I’ve been feeling chaotic I guess. What about you? What’s up in the bleeding colours world that chu live in?

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      1. That Chu live in. That is nice word use.
        Iโ€™ve been good. I think I tried taking off a lot of burden off of me. And it felt good honestly. Really good. I feel a lot free-er.

        Of course more problems arose. But I think I know how to tackle them. Aahhhh๐Ÿฅบ๐ŸŒบ

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          1. Dammmiit!! I forgot that I was supposed to hate your slangs ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜‚. Next time I’ll make sure.
            Take care you too๐ŸŒบ๐ŸŒบ๐ŸŒบ๐ŸŒผ

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